Living up to expectations

It took me exactly 5 minutes to find an article in my facebook newsfeed that portrayed masculinity as something negative. This has become so pervasive these days that people don’t even notice it. But once you start paying attention you quickly understand why Norah Vincent gave up her experiment of masquerading as a man prematurely. It must be damn tough to be exposed to this negativity surrounding your most basic identity all the time.


At the same time I wonder how stupid people actually are. They are bombarding men 24/7 with the message that masculinity is something abhorrent and then they are surprised that men take ever lesser interest in fulfilling their masculine duties. Striving for greatness, perseverance, keeping your word, being faithful, being reliable and providing for the people who depend on you were once cherished masculine traits. In the past 50 years they have come to be ridiculed as despicable ‘male ego’. Little boys in kindergarten and primary school are told that being male is something negative and that only the girls way of being is the good way. And then people wonder why and increasing number of men abandon their longtime girlfriends with their newborns. This seemed most unnatural to me when I heard about it the first time. And just today I read a paragraph in Roy F. Baumeister’s “Is There Anything Good About Men – How Cultures Flourish By Exploiting Men” that this is a new phenomenon that is on the rise. Coincidentally I received a call from a friend – to whom just that has happened  – a few hours later, who was told by her gynecologist that these days more and more men are abandoning their partners and their newborns. It’s always nice when book knowledge is immediately confirmed by practitioners. So these are the ‘new men’ that Feminism promised us? Men who are no longer able to take pride in taking responsibility but act like scared mice when they see a daunting task ahead such as raising a family? Thunk you very much gender ideologues for pushing it down men’s throat for decades that they are worthless and not needed in this world. One doesn’t need a degree in psychology to know that praise and encouragement makes people strive to be the best that they can be and that constant putting down makes a person’s confidence falter and run from responsibility. That is why I support the men’s human rights movement. Because it does what it says on the label. It treats men and women as human beings deserving of kindness and respect because they are humans and because treating people well will lead them to treat others well. The idea what one group of people (women) will have better lives if another group of people (men) is constantly put down and their achievements minimised is ludicrous to say the least. Gender ideologues have created a world in which women feel they have to shoulder all responsibilities, that were once shouldered by a whole family alone, while men feel no longer able to do any of he things that once came naturally to them. It’s a loss-loss situation. And I am very angry at that. Angry that a little girl will have to grow up without a father and angry that people who try to draw attention to these issues get harassed and called any sort of nasty name while gender ideologues are working towards making this situation worse by the day. I am grateful to Paul Elam that he has decided to act as a punching ball to see these people, to accept that his name is dragged through the dirt just to get people finally to listen and hopefully bring about a change – for a more peaceful world.

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